Realisations

This last few weeks have been sort of wild for me, in more than one sense. After handing in my PhD, I dove right into editing some 20 texts on different aspects of peace and conflict, which is kinda typical. I did not sit back and enjoy the feeling of having finished a 5-year-project. I did not look back or give myself at least a virtual nod of recognition. From one mad activity to the next – that’s the pattern.

With what has happened ever since my son was born in August 2007, however, I cannot help but wonder what I’m trying to numb here, what I’m trying to avoid by these mad bursts of activity. I guess that will be the question for the next 10 years or so…

At least, these episodes are becoming shorter, the realisation that I have accomplished something and actually have a right to enjoy that accomplishment is coming sooner. Which is good, because tell you what: If you really can’t give what you don’t have (BrenĂ© Brown, www.ordinarycourage.com), I have a lot of work to do to show my son that he is, in fact, worth all the praise and applause in the world.

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