There were many moments of peace this year. I tend to forget them far too soon, always focussing on the moments of difficulty, of anger, of the “to-do’s”. Why is that? I wish I could adjust my lens a little, put on a different set of glasses to blend out the darkness and focus on the light.
The outstanding moment of peace in 2009 was the moment right after my daughter was born. The birth had been hard work, and there had been a couple of moments in which I really couldn’t believe I could take it anymore. I was at the hospital with my midwife and my husband. No doctors, just us. Soft light, a hot tub – perfect, really. Nevertheless, there was hard work to do. I decided against meds, and it was the right decision; however, I was exhausted, tired, sometimes desperate.
And then, finally, she was there. My first words were “Thank God”, and then my body – and my mind – finally, blissfully relaxed. A moment of peace, indeed, with my daughter in my arms, smiling in her sleep, and nothing else to think or care or worry about.